Day 2.37

Smelling: damp sidewalks, smoky streets
Hearing: Trevor’s unidentified accent
Seeing: drunk students in the streets, academic texts
Tasting: roasted Brussels Sprouts, ginger in hot chocolate
Feeling: a bit of a crackle in my right ankle, slight nausea, tongue burns

I had a bit of a lie-in (as they say on the Isles over here) in the morning since I woke up not feeling 100%, but had to get up eventually for counseling. I was questioning the value of going to my second counseling session, the first one being two weeks ago, but decided that some follow-up was valuable. Indeed it proved to be, but not much more than the first session. Not to knock the counselor, or the student counseling system in general, but I think the ongoing care of my therapist from home was or is what I really need right now. Anyway, there were food kiosks on campus, so I treated myself to a soymilk hot chocolate with ginger from O’Conaill (the big name in town for hot chocolate). I sipped on it while doing some research for those midterm essays which are due in less than a month, yikes.

Sipping some coffee (into which I dunked a bit of leftover donut) before and during my food science lecture persuaded me to stay awake and interested in classes, then I went right back to loafing around. It’s a slow-moving day. And maybe fortunately, I haven’t been feeling too bad about that.

Sure, I love to be busy and zoom around doing all the things and seeing all the people. And I sure wish I could be a little more productive or creative in my procrastination, like doing more drawing and reading instead of scrolling through Twitter and Instagram when I have a spare hour. But it can honestly make me feel sad– not just guilty or anxious, but actual sorrow– when I do too much everything as well as too much nothing. I know that I’m gonna be busy at some point, so becoming a blanket enchilada for all of Friday morning doesn’t do too much damage.

Fencing that night was pretty fun and not too intense except for that we did a lot of free-bouting and that seemed to exhaust everyone. Also since we were all in gear there wasn’t a chest protector for me, but I dealt alright with the bruises.


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